Elon Musk Cancels Free Food at Twitter HQ

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Sometimes, I can make a prediction that is right. For example, when Elon Musk said that at least one amenity would end, I predicted that Twitter’s beloved angels would be stunned, agape, and agog. Twidiots used to have free food, coffee, and foosball. They enjoyed cornhole, meditation rooms, and red wine on tap. Helluva was a way to manage railroads.

Musk demanded that his lunch be cut and that he return to work. It was because the company was spending $13 million per year in a figurative “InSinkErator(r)”.

Tracy Hawkins used to be the vice president of work transformation at Twitter.

This is a lie. I created the program one week ago. I decided to resign as I didn’t want to work for @elonmusk.

According to The New York Post, Musk kept the receipts but fired back.

Musk said that more people prepare breakfast than eat it.

False. Twitter invests $13M/year in food service at SFHQ. A badge shows a peak occupancy of 25% and an average occupancy of 10%.

There are more people preparing breakfast than eating breakfast.

They don’t bother with dinner because there aren’t any other people in this building.

Will he keep his free wine? If yes, @elonmusk, how can I get my hands on it?

Musk was accused of “starving” his employees. Musk was accused of “starving his employees.” To get a big treat, I had to save 25c each week. To get a large treat, I had to save 25c each week.

Musk broke one of the 21st century’s most important commandments: He shouldn’t ask anyone to cut the crust of a few hundred PB&J sandwiches. He should instead have carrot sticks and dried cereal, juice boxes, juice boxes, and a word-search game. Or a prize to those who hate his stomach.